Archive for Grieving

Unhappy Anniversary

black balloons

“When a year later arrived, I didn’t like the date of Mom’s death being called an anniversary.”

I don’t recall if that statement was read in a book or was part of a conversation. But the sentence has stuck with me, bothered me, and I still haven’t done much to change one of my phone habits.

Included in my responsibilities at the hospice where I work is calling the bereaved. Based on our company’s guidelines, we try to schedule calls several weeks and several months after the family member or friend has died. With some exceptions, the final scheduled phone contact is near the one year “anniversary” of the death date.

I’m glad we do. Even a brief or awkward conversation lets a griever know they are not forgotten. In many of those calls, no one will answer. These days, people are more likely to let a phone ring and find out later who left—or didn’t leave—a message. There are always disconnected numbers or ones that block “unknown” callers. However, quite a few people do respond. They are at work or home or traveling and suddenly there is this voice on the other end asking them, almost a year later, how they are doing. Read More →

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